


Dared Ya

by Saranghae



Category: DCU (Comics), Marvel
Genre: Bruce has lost it, Fluff, Gen, M/M, Shenanigans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-12
Updated: 2015-10-12
Packaged: 2018-04-26 00:05:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4982005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saranghae/pseuds/Saranghae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prompt: Bruce dares Tony to touch the dinosaur. >:D</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dared Ya

**Author's Note:**

  * For [NoveraNoam](https://archiveofourown.org/users/NoveraNoam/gifts).



> prompt by: [totallynotfeelingtheaster](http://totallynotfeelingtheaster.tumblr.com/)
> 
> Original Post [X](http://bratmin.tumblr.com/post/130729511743/prompt-bruce-dares-tony-to-touch-the-dinosaur>X</a>)

A week. One whole obnoxious, pretentious, ego filled  _week_. Bruce wasn’t sure how much more of this he could handle.

Or, more specifically, how much of  _him_  he could handle. Tony Stark; genius, playboy, billionaire, philanthropist (or at least that’s what he called himself). It had been a week since he had invaded the cave via the portal that connected their dimensions.

To be fair, he wasn’t actually in the cave that often. Mostly it was a parade of his children and Clark going through the portal to spend time in the other dimension. Which he didn’t mind, honestly. It kept them out of his hair. It kept them  _all_  out of his hair. 

Bruce prided himself on being indifferent to most of the human race. There was a small handful of people he actually disliked and an even smaller handful of people he liked.

This man, though, had managed to push every single button Bruce had until he felt like he was loosing his mind. He touched  _everything._  He played and fiddled and hovered and asked questions and Bruce was seconds away from murder.

Dick insisted this was the closest Bruce had ever gotten to honest to God murder and he feared for Tony’s life. Bruce didn’t correct him, seeing as he was right. Today was no exception.

Steve had come into the cave looking for Clark, who had just so happened to be there at the time, and Tony had followed him. Bruce pointedly ignored him, refusing to rise to his taunts. However, after Tony got fed up with being ignored, he decided it was a good idea to start pushing buttons. Literally.

“Don’t touch that.”

Lucky for Tony’s fingers, he retracted his hand before Bruce could slice them off with a batarang.

“You have no organization. What do half these things even do, anyway? For a universe with such advanced technology, this is a little… dated, don’t you think?”

Bruce’s face twitched. “It serves it’s purpose. Why should I fix it if it’s not broken?”

Tony made a disgusted noise in the back of his throat and rolled his eyes, leaning against the console. “Really? You actually just said that to me?”

Bruce barely refrained from poking his eyes out with the pen in his hand.

“Don’t lean on my computer. Go entertain yourself. There are lots of pretty things to satisfy your short attention span on the other side of the cave.”

Tony pouted. Bruce gave him a look of thinly veiled distain. 

“I’ve already looked at all of that junk. All of it is either stupid or doesn’t make sense. Or both.”

Bruce looked back toward the screen. “Really? You seem the type of man to be thoroughly entertained by a life sized t-rex.”

Bruce saw the corner of Tony’s mouth twitch out of the corner of his eye. “Well… Maybe that’s a little cool. But it’s just a statue. It would be better if it was a real dinosaur.”

If Bruce had been paying any attention to Clark and Steve on the other side of the room, he would have noticed Clark having a mini heart attack as he watched a smile slowly spread across Bruce’s lips. 

It was the kind of smile you saw on someone’s face before you ran away. Very fast.

“Hmm… Now that would be better, wouldn’t it?” His head tilted just slightly to the side as he continued to smile villainously at Tony, who was currently three shades paler and sweating nervously.

“Why don’t you go and touch the dinosaur, Tony? Make sure it’s really just a statue.”

Tony’s eyes narrowed, the look of complete distrust and utmost suspicion on his face.

“That’s not a real dinosaur.” Even he wouldn’t be able to deny the doubt in his own voice at that moment.

Bruce’s innocent face was half hidden by the cowl, but Tony’s face displayed how much he did not believe what little innocence he saw. 

“Of course not. Go touch it.”

Tony stood up straight, eyes narrowing further as Bruce egged him on. 

“Touch it, Stark. I know you’re dying to try it.”

Tony took a step toward the dinosaur.

By now, their display had caught the attention of the two men in blue on the other side of the room. 

“Uh, Tony… I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“Of course it is, Clark. It’s a wonderful idea.” Clark visibly shivered at the tone in Bruce’s voice. Coming from Bruce, the velvety sweetness would have been normal, even seductive, but coming from Batman? It was terrifying.

Tony looked behind him toward the impending shadow of the t-rex. He took another step toward it, slowly making his way across the room. He never took his eyes from Bruce.

Bruce continued to smile, purring out sweet encouragements.  _Go on_ and _just one touch._

Clark kept telling Tony what a very bad idea that was, in between telling Bruce to stop it because he was giving him the creeps.

Tony slowed, torn between his ego telling him he couldn’t let Bruce win and his common sense telling him he probably shouldn’t follow the instructions of someone who looked like a panther about to get a free meal.

There was no way Bruce was letting Tony back down now, not when he was so close.

“Come on, Tony. I  _dare_  you.”

You could cut the silence in the air with a butter knife. 

Steve swore softly and put his face in his hands, Clark covered his eyes with his fingers, only to peek out between them, and Bruce’s smile grew ever wider as Tony, look of utter determination on his face, stepped up next to the dinosaur and raised his hand.

Time seemed to slow as he lowered it, letting it rest against the hind leg of the large beast.

There was a few seconds where nothing happened, no one even breathed. Tony stared at Bruce with a look that said  _whatcha got now, batsy,_ and you could almost believe it was that anticlimactic when–

“Fido, sit.”

Bruce would admit he was a little disappointed Tony hadn’t been flattened when the dinosaur shifted and sat down with a  _thump_  and a poof of dust. The noise Tony made, though, almost made up for it.

Steve looked caught between complete shock and hysterical laughter, crumpling to the floor after only a few moments. Clark didn’t seem to be able to choose between being flabbergasted at Bruce, apologizing at Tony, or joining Steve on the floor. 

Bruce just  _smiled._ He doubled over in his chair and cackled, his laughter echoing around the cave so loudly he woke a few bats, their fluttering wings only adding to the noise.

Tony, dishevelled and embarrassed, managed to pick himself off the ground where he’d fallen. He brushed himself off and stormed off with a huff, slipping through the portal to collect what little dignity he had left.

Steve practically crawled toward the portal to join him and help smooth his ruffled feathers. 

By the time Bruce calmed down Clark was already standing next to him. The dark knight smiled up at him, head tipping to the side. Clark sat astride Bruce’s lap now they were alone, placing his hand on Bruce’s shoulder.

“You know,” Clark said, leaning a little closer as Bruce’s arms slid around the Kryptonian’s waist, “that wasn’t very nice.”

Bruce hummed, cheeks flushed from a type of merriment he hadn’t allowed himself for years. “No,” he said softly with a small shake of his head. “But it was fun.”

Clark smiled, nodding and slowly pulling the cowl down to reveal Bruce’s face. “It was very fun.”


End file.
